There's a Child Out Here, People. That's the Reality.

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If a lactating woman pumps in the wilderness… May 28, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — aggieonboard @ 8:16 am

Last night, during the hazy twilight of near-sleep, I remembered  that we have a field trip today. (As I write this, we are about to embark on a wilderness adventure requiring sunscreen, bug spray, and patience.) Then I remembered there aren’t any special dogwoods out there with electrical outlets. And I panicked.

Why? Am I that spoiled of a city brat that I would need to bring my cappuccino machine? Was my heart beating wildly as I considered spending seven hours without my laptop?

No.

I was freaking out because the magical machine that extracts the nectar to keep my kid alive requires some sort of electrical energy to function. I couldn’t just wait until we got back to school to pump because my boobs would EXPLODE. What was I going to do?!

Fortunately, I remembered then that my pump came with a fancy pants battery pack. Eight Duracell coppertops later, we’re in business. Now I just have to find a way and a place to slip off to for thirty minutes without my fifth graders noticing my absence.

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3 Responses to “If a lactating woman pumps in the wilderness…”

  1. Craig Says:

    I thought there was just some sort of hand pump you had to squeeze, or that you could squeeze your nipple and it would spray out. Guess not.

    • aggieonboard Says:

      The squeezing makes a nice party trick, but it’s not an efficient means of extraction.And hand pumps are SO 1990.

  2. mrs.maybride Says:

    Good luck! I tried pumping in the car with a battery pack and the batteries died within five minutes. No bueno. My batteries could’ve been old, though. At any rate, I was DYING to get home!


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