There's a Child Out Here, People. That's the Reality.

Join me on my journey through parenthood. BYOHelmet.

Self-Restraint: I haz it. April 24, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — aggieonboard @ 8:38 am

Last night when Mr. Aggie unknowingly bequeathed me an improperly diapered babe, who proceeded to turn our bed into a swimming pool, I didn’t say aloud all the defamatory thoughts in my head.  


When I had to get up and change the unwitting offender, resulting in a state of complete and total alertness instead of the desired snooze-a-thon, I didn’t yell at my spouse.


When I couldn’t sleep even though Mr. Aggie said he’d take Stinks into the living room, I didn’t play opposum just to punish him.


When I saw that Mr. Aggie had Stinks pointed directly at the blaring TV instead of rocking him in a dark corner, I didn’t berate him.


When Andrew wouldn’t go to sleep until 12:15, I didn’t dangle him, screaming, over Mr. Aggie’s side of the bed.


When the cat started trying to claw at Andrew’s head, sneezed on us several times, and then found a noisy toy to chase around the living room all moments after Andrew dozed off, I didn’t follow through on any of my muttered threats of dismemberment.


When I took Andrew back to bed at 1:00 but couldn’t fall asleep myself, I didn’t throat punch my snoring husband.


At 5:30 this morning when I asked Mr. Aggie to get Stinks dressed and changed while I took I shower and instead found Stinks crying like a crazy person while my husband moaned ineffectually at him without waking up before I could even get the water to the proper temperature, I didn’t hit Mr. Aggie in the head with a cast iron skillet.


When I got Stinks and myself completely ready to leave for work while Mr. Aggie continued to snooze, I didn’t drop an anvil on his manparts.


When I had to turn a light on, I didn’t light up  the place like the flippin’ Fourth of July, complete with fireworks and a marching band.


When I left for work, crying baby in-tow, I didn’t give Mr. Aggie the finger.


I don’t know that I can claim full credit for the last one, since I’m pretty sure I only resisted because I knew it wouldn’t be effective given that Mr. Aggie was—you guessed it—still sleeping.

My husband is a fabulous father and a very supportive spouse, but last night and this morning helped me understand how some marriages are irreparably  damaged by child-rearing. It’s exhausting and stressful, and the only person who truly understands your misery is too miserable himself to offer much sympathy. It’s a breeding ground for one-up-manship and resentment and an open invitation to scorekeeping and judgement. It would be a completely crap deal except for this:



4 Responses to “Self-Restraint: I haz it.”

  1. mrs.maybride Says:

    If you take out the part about you getting up to leave for work and taking the baby with you, I could’ve written this post myself. It can be so easy to resent the spouse who gets to sleep through everything when you are sleep-deprived.

  2. Mrs.H723 Says:

    I ❤ you and this post. Amen sistah.

  3. Yolanda Says:

    As a mother of two and bearer of two C-sections, I feel your pain. Sometimes daddies can be lots of help and other times none at all. It’s like they can sleep through the baby’s screams and seem to be totally oblivious to the fact that mommy just might be tired too. It’s imperative that conversation on the topic take place as immediately as possible. This will help to alleviate the build up of resentment and the total “duh-ness” of daddy. Trust me, been there, done that, and in a new phase!

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