There's a Child Out Here, People. That's the Reality.

Join me on my journey through parenthood. BYOHelmet.

A typical exchange September 27, 2008

Filed under: pregnancy — aggieonboard @ 3:16 pm

Background: Mr. Aggie has lovingly placed two corn dogs in the oven for moi, where they have baked to perfection for exactly 18 minutes.

Oven: Beep, Beep, Beep…

Me (sweetly): Ahem…excuse me…

Him: Yes?

Me (same way): Excuse me…I’m pregnant.

Him: I know you’re pregnant. [As he gets up from his chair.]

Me: Smile.

Him: Deep sigh.

Coffee table: Receives two corn dogs, mustard, and beverage.

Life is good.


I might not survive. September 26, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — aggieonboard @ 8:47 am

I just got a craving for peppermint hot chocolate from Starbucks that has ground my world to a stop. I can think of nothing else. I know that it wouldn’t be nearly as good as I imagine, but I need it. I think what I’m really jonesing (why is that a word?) for is fall. Glorious, glorious fall. Having lived in Texas my whole life, I know we don’t have a real fall. We have a moderate cooling period before a weeklong cold period, then it’s back to short sleeves and sweating. Still, I live for that crisp breeze and fall scents. I’m a sucker for anything fall scented.

Anyway, if you’re out and about and want to take pity on a poor pregnant lady, please deliver the cocoa. And bring the requisite weather, too.


Lenny has a landing spot. September 20, 2008

Filed under: pregnancy — aggieonboard @ 3:11 pm
Tags: ,

Here’s the crib and dresser we bought. We decided against the hutch, since the room is about the size of an upscale closet. Trying to keep it simple, you know. We also decided on the travel system (car seat + stroller) we wanted, which I was really stressed about. We bought the crib and dresser but we’re registering for the travel system. Why buy for yourself when others are willing to buy for you, no?

After that adventure, we had some lunch and bought our groceries. Now we’re relaxing at home, watching A&M vs. Miami, and then we’ll attempt to put our house back together. (We had new floors put in last week, so almost all of our worldly possessions are in the garage.)

Also, Lenny likes candy corn.


As the belly (and the backside) grows… September 19, 2008

Filed under: pregnancy — aggieonboard @ 8:29 pm
Tags: ,

Notice how the shirt is already straining against the massivosity that is my midsection.

Started with my new class of 5th graders. Have some interesting personalities. I’ve only taught bilingual before, so I’ve never had any white/African American/Eskimo kids. It is different. One boy came with a bad reputation. Everyone apologized when they heard I’d gotten him. We did a get to know you activity where they had to make up 10 truths/lies about themselves. His first entry: “I like to read.” True. Next? “I am bad.” Also true, according to him.

It says something that that label is so ingrained in him already. I saw him first thing in the morning getting in trouble. His teacher was talking to him like he was a misbehaving dog that had just pooped on the carpet. It was just a bad situation. I’m sure I’ll lose my temper with him, don’t get me wrong, but I’m going to make a concentrated effort to let him keep his dignity. I’ll let you know how it goes.


Screw you, Dr. Doom September 15, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — aggieonboard @ 8:15 pm

I had a fairly uneventful appointment today, except for the part where I still gained four pounds even after being assigned-and following-the most cruel pregnancy diet known to man. Dr. Doom still declared this a success, and decreed that the torturous regiment will continue throughout the pregnancy. I need a new doctor.

In happier news, Lenny has been moving a ton and I can feel it. At the appointment, Dr. Nunez commented on how much he/she was moving around and laughed when Lenny kicked the doppler (twice). Mr. Aggie finally got to feel him/her kick (or punch) last night. It was so special to see him really connect with el bebe. I know he knows there’s a live being in there, but it takes on a whole new level of reality when you actually feel it for yourself.

Other than that, this week is complete and total chaos. I’m moving back to 5th grade, which means I had to start off the day by breaking up with 16 eight year olds. It sucked. I have to move out (into this crappy room that features a partition instead of a wall, and houses the insanely, obnoxiously loud theater arts teacher on the other side) and might start with the new class as early as Thursday. You’d think my principal would give me more warning than that, unless of course you knew him.

In order to maximize the chaos in my world, Mr. Aggie and I are having every scrap of flooring replaced in our house this week. The tile (replacing vinyl) is awesome. The carpet (replacing nasty carpet) is…still carpet. I hate all carpet, I think it’s all ugly and I couldn’t find anything I liked. The Mr. decided on something, which has morphed into a dark brown shag in my mind but (hopefully) won’t be that bad. I’m not optimistic. (Surprise, surprise.)


Various memos to el bebe September 9, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — aggieonboard @ 9:17 pm

Dear fetus,

You are the size of a banana. I am the size of a house. Surely you have enough room, so stop pushing my belly farther outward. People are commenting daily on how fast I’m growing. Stop being greedy.

As far as that goes, if you could also be so kind as to leave some dinner for me, that would be much appreciated. I have this image of you quickly gathering all of my food and then running off to eat in the corner, sparing not a crumb for your poor host. (Yes, I compared my baby to a parasite. I’m starving.) I’m about to eat dinner number two, can you please not steal it all? Thanks.

Also, I’m sorry the cat keeps climbing on you. She doesn’t realize that my belly isn’t the same anymore and that she will continue to slide off. Maybe you can retire to another wing in your cavernous estate while you wait for her to give up?

I’m glad we’ve had this talk, and I hope we can come to a resolution that will satisfy us both. I love you already, tremendously.

With love,

Your Momma

P.S. I’m about to feed you some cookies and see if you might kick Daddy so he can feel you. Try to show off, k?


An update about nothing September 6, 2008

Filed under: pregnancy — aggieonboard @ 11:07 am
Tags: ,

Things are cruising right along, both here and with Lenny (I think, though I can’t see for myself). I’m in the midst of my first extended craving: an affinity for corn dogs that borders on obsession. I think what I really like about it is the mustard, but the nitrates are awfully enticing in their own right. I’m still following my doctor’s diet, and I hope the newfound love for battered pig parts doesn’t offset my hard work.

We went to the Red Sox game last night since they were in town to publicly humilate the Rangers. I wore the same t-shirt I bought in Boston in July to wear to the game at Fenway, and this time Lenny took up a lot more of it. I hope people could tell I was pregnant and didn’t think I was just deluding myself about my beer belly or that I don’t own a mirror.

I’m still not feeling the kid much, even though I read he/she is supposed to be the same length as a banana. You’d think you would feel that. I’m not in a rush to start getting assaulted from the inside, so I don’t mind waiting awhile longer.

Mr. Aggie has gone to get a haircut, but when he gets back I think we might go do a little shopping for el bebe and for his/her mommy. I plan on milking these last four months (when everything is about me me me) for all that I can. Once the baby’s born I’m pretty sure no one will look at me again for at least a year.